CT Scans, IVs, and Wisdom

On Saturday, June 1, I was driving back home from the airport. Jessie was in the van, asleep as usual when we go to drop Jacob off for a visit with the grandparents. I had just turned onto the toll road to head back home, when in my left temple, I felt the sensation of liquid moving through a tube under my skin. I don’t know how to adequately explain it other than feeling like a long, skinny balloon was filled with slightly thick liquid, and it had moved from near my ear to the corner of my eye socket. After that, I got a sharp, stabbing localized headache.

My doctor’s nurse, a beautiful, wonderful lady named Barbara, told me it was at that point I should have gone to the Emergency Room. And I probably should have, but I had Jessie in the car, and I had this reason, and I didn’t normally get headaches, and so I really didn’t think it was anything serious. My step-grandfather (grandma’s second husband), recently had a stroke, and while I knew that a headache wasn’t a stroke, I really didn’t know what was going on. I decided to sleep on it. The next day, it felt better, at least until I touched that part of my head. A pattern developed: touch it and it hurts. Occasionally to relieve the boredom of that, a random headache in that part of my head would start. Advil did nothing.

Finally, yesterday I went to the doctor after a week of dealing with this. When Barbara asked why I hadn’t come in earlier, I told her the truth–I was stupid.

The visit led to scheduling a CT-scan at the local hospital, which was this morning. The procedure went well, even though I’m not a big fan of IVs for fainting and nausea reasons. However, they needed to inject contrast, so in went the IV.

The hard part about procedures is how you explain your fears, especially to your kids. How do I tell Jacob that I’m a bit afraid? Jacob has ITP; he gets his finger stuck every six months to check his platelet level. But still, I felt like I had to talk to him about my being afraid and that it was okay to be afraid.

After telling me that he used to be afraid, but he wasn’t anymore, he said this: “Don’t be afraid, Daddy. God is with you.”

I don’t know where he got it, but I’m thankful for him and his little unexpected wisdom.

P.S. The scan came back clean. It’s just an inflamed nerve in my temple.

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